Not long ago, at an Altar Guild dinner, the issue of foot washing came up. Specifically, the Holy Week service at St. A's during which the clergy wash the feet of worshippers. Hartshorn said that fewer worshippers were participating in the foot washing every year. I admitted that I was one of those people who shuddered at the thought of it. We had a discussion and later Hartshorn asked me to write the "con" side of foot washing. So here goes.

When I think about having my feet washed in church, my immediate response is "Ick." The only thing I can compare it to is cleaning toilets at a cheap motel. I've never done this but the thought of it creates the same visceral reaction I have to foot washing. I mean no disrespect to Jesus or our clergy or God. I like my feet. They have served me well. But, without getting too personal, my feet are not something to be vain about. My sisters and I have been sensitive about our feet since we were young. One sister still refers to hers as "clown feet." We use to joke that the family burial plots would have two feet sticking up out of the earth. Canoes. Boats. Skis. Our feet have been called it all. Perhaps that is one reason why the thought of a stranger washing my feet or me washing a stranger's feet makes me so uncomfortable. It feels too personal. It feels unsanitary. Shameful. And just plain icky.

Hartshorn talked about how, in Jesus' time, people's feet were in very bad shape. I can imagine. Those people walked everywhere and Timberland hadn't been invented yet. Their feet were constantly exposed to the dust and dung of the road. Jesus didn't take off that servant's socks and shoes to wash relatively clean feet. He washed really filthy feet. I believe Hartshorn's point was that any foot washing done today is not going to be half as icky as Jesus had it. Yet, to my mind, the people in Jesus's time were always getting their feet washed. Everyone was used to having their feet handled, touched and washed on a regular basis. It was a part of that culture. Today, in Santa Monica, the only people who wash my feet are me and the ladies at the day spa, before an occasional pedicure. That is part of our culture and I am comfortable with that.

Hartshorn talked about foot washing as an act of humility. Others present confirmed that it was a powerful spiritual experience for them. I could see how much it meant to them. I thought about the quality of being humble. I wondered why my reaction to foot washing was so visceral. I wondered if those who do get their feet washed do so easily or if they are simply able to overcome their own "ick" factors to experience God's grace. To grow. I realized that I never get past "ick" to the Jesus component. The gift of letting go of my own importance. I didn't change my mind though. I gave up desserts, I'm attending the Lenten series about saints and working on being more mindful of God during these forty days but I draw a line at foot washing. I can't do it. It makes me too uncomfortable. I will not be walking up the aisle in St. A's on that night during Holy Week and experiencing humility by having my feet washed.

Or will I?